Do you know how to make your child feel better about themselves? Compliments can actually improve the self-esteem of the child and give them a sense that you as a parent are interested in their lives and actions.
How do you feel when someone compliments your shoes, your cooking, or a job well done? It’s a good feeling. But how do you feel when someone you really care about compliments you on something? That’s a great feeling. So imagine the power of the compliments for kids we’re going to share with you today. A child who feels valued and accepted by his mother can change the world. A child who feels like her mother thinks she’s wonderful can better weather the challenges life sends her way.
Research shows that the most motivating compliments for children are those that praise hard work, the process they use to reach goals, and traits like perseverance and dedication. But, be sure to give other compliments too — how beautiful and handsome they are (all children are beautiful or handsome in their mother’s eyes!), how strong and kind they are (children will likely live up to what they feel we believe them to be), and how amazing they are, in general (every child is amazing).
Take a look at the areas in which you should compliment your children. They’re here in these 10 compliments your kids need to hear:
1. Compliment their character.
We live in a world where integrity is neither consistently taught nor widely-expected. When our children demonstrate honesty, kindness, trustworthiness, and reliability, that’s a great time to take them aside and offer a sincere compliment.
2. Compliment obedience and respect.
It’s too easy to fall into patterns of disapproval, where the only time we notice is when kids do wrong. Rather than waiting for disobedience or disrespect (then coming down like a ton of bricks), try noticing obedience and respect: “I don’t always remember to tell you, but you are an awesome young man, and I appreciate the way you treat your mother”.
3. Compliment them for simply being part of the family.
“Every time I see you, I’m thankful that I’m your Mom.” Kids need to understand that they are valued simply because they are.
4. Compliment contributions to the family.
“Clearing the table (sweeping the porch, putting out the trash) makes a real difference. I appreciate your contribution.” Kids need to understand that what …